Absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? But you’ve also heard, “out of sight, out of mind”. So which one is it?
If we are talking about relationships, there’s no right answer. It depends on you and the relationship. You disappearing will most likely make his heart grow fonder, but will yours?
I am naturally a person of detachment. I have no issue cutting someone out of my life if I feel it is needed. Usually I do this when I have lost interest or see no real future together. However, there have been times when I have cut someone off when I really liked them. I most likely stopped contacting them because I started to feel like they weren’t giving me what I needed or something was wrong. The reason I stopped contacting them was to give myself time to clear my head and think about what I really want.
See the problem is, it seems like everyone wants to leave to teach the other person a lesson. Although it can be very satisfying to see someone scramble when you’re gone, it’s not about them. It’s about you. Stop thinking of doing it for them and do it for yourself.
During this time, go out to dinner with your friends. Spend some of the time talking about the issues, but don’t let it take over your night. Talk about fun things and laugh about random topics. Call your mother, aunt, grandmother, uncle, brother, or whoever and vent to them. Most likely they have been through whatever you are going through and can give you some insight.
You might realize after a couple of weeks that you actually feel good without the burden of that person. Maybe you actually like being single. If this is the case, out of sight and out of mind worked. That person wasn’t right for you and that’s okay because there is someone better out there for you.
Some of you are probably thinking that would never happen. You know you will miss them greatly. That’s fine too because maybe you are meant to be. But at least you took the time to realize it. You can now have a conversation about your realization and discuss what you are both going to do to fix the relationship. In this case, absence did make the heart grow fonder.
We all know that emotions are hard to control. Sometimes we don’t know why we feel the way we do, we just do. So honestly, you cannot predict how distance will make you feel. We’ve seen it break relationships and we’ve also seen people get their act together once they felt it slipping away.
This is why you have to take the break for yourself and only yourself. If you are not happy then take a step back. When you separate yourself from the situation you will start to evaluate what is important. You will have a better understanding if something is worth fixing or better forgotten.