There Is No Wrong Decision

6268864aaa0142b1df333067747646ad.jpg

In college I had a professor who was also my boss at my internship. Once she got to know me, she realized I overthink everything. I struggle with every decision I make.  I have to make a pros and cons list and argue both sides 5 times. I always think there is a better way to do something. I go over all the “what ifs” I can think of. I want critics and outside perspectives.

She was nothing like me. She was very calm and honestly, she probably got tired of my craziness. Every time I would start debating things, she would tell me, “There is no wrong decision. You make a decision and you make it right.”

Okay lady (major eye roll). For your information, it is worth it to write lists, over analyze, and drive yourself crazy because there actually are wrong decisions.

I never actually said that to her because she was my teacher and boss, but that’s what I thought the first 6 times she said it…..

And she kept saying it until I started to think (or maybe overthink) about it.

Now that a few years have gone by and I’ve changed as a person (kind of), I realized she was right.

There is no such thing as a wrong decision. When you have two options, you go with your gut. There is a reason you want to pick one over the other. Once a decision has been made, it’s done. There is no turning back. The only thing left to do is stick with your choice and ride it out.

Every choice I have made (whether I consider it good or bad) has brought me to where I am right now, which I believe is where I’m suppose to be.

So maybe if I debated a little more about some of my life choices, I would have came up with a better solution. Maybe I would have done things differently and could have avoided some heartbreaks and disappointment. But honestly, those things made me a better person. I had to experience some bad times to make me stronger and know myself better.

There is nothing wrong with making a decision or going for the things you want. You might not get the result you pictured, but you’ll get where you’re supposed to be..and that’s comforting to me.

A Promise To Myself

d59a6688ccb5a6379bf165f658bed3eb.jpg

 

I’m a mess, but I haven’t always been. I’ve lost myself a little bit. I need to get back to me. I need to be on track.

So this is a promise letter to myself. These are the things I will do to feel in control again.

1. I will make time for myself. I used to love alone time. I’m not sure what changed these past several months, but I’ve put my self-care to the side. I will bring it back.

2. I will challenge myself. I took a lot of risks in 2017. I quit my job, went on an adventure, moved across the country, and many other things. Everything became so overwhelming and I felt discouraged. I will no longer allow myself to feel defeated. I will get up and keep challenging myself. My break is over.

3. I will forgive myself. I have been so hard on myself this past year. I keep looking back and analyzing everything. I always think of that I could have done better, how I could have been better, accomplished more, and so on. The truth is, I have done a damn good job at taking risks and putting myself out there. I need to be proud of what I have accomplished,  not what I could have.

4. I will do the things I want to. I will stop finding excuses. I will stop being lazy. I will stop revolving my schedule around other people in my life. I said I was moving to California to have fun, find adventure, and find myself. I can’t let myself down.

5. I will stop worrying about what other people think of me. This is the hardest one for me to admit, but I have to be honest with myself. I don’t know when I turned into the girl that worries about other people’s opinions, but I have and I don’t like it. Maybe it’s because I lost myself. It’s easy to be confident when you have a “great” relationship, great grades in college, and an amazing job right when you graduate. It’s easy to be proud of yourself when money is not an issue, you can shop whenever you want, travel, and you’re living a stable life. But what about when all that is gone?  I’ve lost my confidence, but I will get it back.

2017 has been a whirlwind. I have felt sad, happy, anxious, lost, excited, scared, confused, and 100 other emotions. 2017 brought me to where I need to be. I will be a better me in 2018. I promise myself.

Who Should You Keep?

freedom-friends-girls-nature-Favim.com-180932.jpg

 

It’s human nature to want to be loved. We need friends to reassure us that we belong. But  as time goes on, the importance of quantity diminishes and quality rises . My smaller, solid group of loyal and supportive friends has brought me more happiness than being popular ever has.

Although it may sound harsh, getting rid of friends is necessary at times. I want to invest myself in people that genuinely care, love, and support. Not people that come around when it is convenient or serves them.

I took the time to evaluate what people I want in my life and these are the people I chose for my team.

 

Continue reading

10 Signs It’s More Than A Crush

742821e06bcf62dbdba75b132e813e1e.jpg

1. You don’t shave your legs, straighten your hair, and put on your best clothes every day just incase they run into you somewhere or ask to hang out. They know you are a real human being who is not perfect 24/7. They will still touch your stubbly unkept legs…or in my case, run their hands through my week long dry-shampoo hair.

2. You don’t need extravagant plans to impress or see each other. You’re happy with doing just about anything. They can come over in sweatpants and hang out, go grocery shopping, or sit on a sidewalk and talk. The conversation and laughter comes easy, it doesn’t matter where you are.

3. When you do want to make plans, there’s no hyperventilating before inviting them. When you need a date for a wedding in a month, you invite them. It’s simple. They will go with you as long as they don’t have something else planned.

4. You have no issue talking about what’s on your mind. You say the really dumb things you wanted to say before, but were too afraid of looking stupid. You’re past worrying about being judged because they know your silly, loud, or crazy side and still haven’t ran……yet.

Continue reading

Learn To Give Your Best

4dd30197b89ae91e18a16956b74e6205.jpg

You’ve proven yourself time and time again, but this is still new to me and old habits die hard.

I’m the first to jump to conclusions. I can convince myself of almost anything and I’ll always take the first opportunity to run. It’s nothing against you. It’s just who I’ve become.

I associate commitment with a loss of independence and my heart naturally longs for freedom.

Deep down I know relationships don’t have to be suffocating. I’m just biased because it’s all I’ve known.

But I think you can change my mind. You never ask too much of me. You care without expectation. I appreciate that about you. So I’ll try to be a better me because you’re always giving the best of you.

The Lucky One

14d60a58cdcdb5e48a31a769737338ef.jpg

 

I wouldn’t call myself a conceited person, but I do know my worth. I’m not afraid to be alone. I don’t freely offer time, effort, or affection. You have to be lucky to get that.

I date casually, but it’s mostly for entertainment purposes and to pass time. But true commitment is a whole different story. There are high expectations that need to be met in order to catch me. Unfortunately, so many people seem mediocre.

Then I met you. Continue reading